november,

i have so much to do, but thost id take a break to update. whats going on in my head. there are plenty of men out there trying to hook up with me, some are sleazy as they are married and think i wanna cyber sex or something,  i am flat out not interested in a relationship with any one other than friendship. i will not be involved with any man. i can not allow any man in my life because my number one priority is now and will be to be the best parent i can be, i do not trust any man and in no way wanna play house. i crave sex with only one person, i have a wonderful imangination, its vivid, i can relive a moment like it was the same moment again. seems a man runs away when they dont have to lasso and catch a mustang, they like the chase.. i survived a long time this way without a man, without dating, without any sex, but from myself, i can do it for a lifetime. god sends me the right man, but that man has to choose whether he wants me, but he has the key to my heart my soul and will forever be my bestfriend, my muse. my inspiration to live again,  really havnt told anyone. well i gotta type up some of my legal defense, i got court nov 29 on a cnc case, i m denying the charges of truancy, i did everything im supposed to do reguarding homeschool. part of me wants to just say okay, part of me wants to fight for my right and others to homeschool. in the mean time i gotta find an apartment, figure out what employer will hire me, and decide if i still wanta get my associate degree at college.  so i gotta lot to think about. this whole situation wasnt in my plans, but like i said sometimes destiny leads us in a diff direction than previously planned. gotta get some work done, i wasted an hour